Papa

My dad was in town last week and it was great.  This morning Baby A walked into D’s room where he had stayed and said, “Papa?  Hello?  Papa?”  It broke my heart.  Our kids have such a strong bond with my dad, even though they’ve only seen him a handful of times in their lives.

And yes, I did shed more than a couple of tears after I dropped him off at the airport, because honestly, he’s my favorite parent.  In the back of my mind I think I knew my kids would miss him in the morning, contributing to the water works.  D had a particularly rough day at school and his mood was annotated as “mad”.

I’m sure things will feel normal by the end of the week.  During his time here there was a cloud over him.  I have a feeling it had to do with my mom, who was also here for part of his stay.  They have not been on speaking terms for a few months now and it was incredibly awkward.  My husband has often made the observation that they are complete opposites, similar only in that they are parents to four children it seems like.

It might sound inappropriate, but I wish my mom would have left a long time ago.  It’s tiring to hear about how much she’s upset with him or that he is so lacking in certain areas for her.  She won’t though, she is incapable of being financially independent.  It got embarrassing to go out with the both of them:  my dad would pay her way in and she would try to buy a separate ticket for herself.  He would pay for her meal and she would have cash out at the register.

I want to have an honest conversation with my dad but he is very reserved when it comes to things of this manner.  He didn’t even tell me he had prostate cancer until after he had completed his treatment.  His justification was that he didn’t want to worry me.

In a perfect world my dad would be able to move down here and live close to his grandchildren.  The week he was here he was their Papa:  they went to the zoo, pool, park and museum and they loved every minute of it.  We miss him terribly already.

One thought on “Papa

  1. So warming and heartbreaking all at the same time. But also, as grown ups, especially when your kids have ‘left the nest’ you don’t want people dictating your relationship, even if you see that others relationships are toxic. So happy you spent time with your dad! 😊🙏🏽

    Liked by 1 person

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