It’s the beginning of the second full week of school and yesterday was the second bad day D has had this year. The first one was Monday. I am slowly learning a lesson here: everyone has bad days, even my 3 year old son.
Most of the time D is a sweet, playful boy with the biggest symmetrical dimples. He loves to be squeezed and sometimes has other mild sensory needs. Some days though, he would just rather be alone and do his own thing, especially if there are any unannounced or unexpected changes. It just so happens my dad left Sunday – whom D misses a lot, and his regular aide at school had to take the week off. Two major shifts in his regularly scheduled programming has been tough on my little man.
The thing is I have a conniption when my coffee isn’t just right but my son is expected to resume normal operation even though he’s struggling to understand some high level changes in his world. At first I would stress about it, but as it keeps happening I’m accepting that it will eventually happen again.
There is an amplification of his bad days because of his diagnosis and that’s one of my biggest hurdles: resisting the urge to become defensive when my son’s behavior is documented. For those of us who have mostly nonverbal children, it can be twice as worrisome. He can’t tell me what stresses him to the point of a meltdown or give me clues about his day. All I get is a sheet of paper 📝 with a check mark ✅ next to a mood option.
At home he is as happy a clam, playful and sensory seeking as usual. No indications of what transpired in class at all.
I have no idea when things will settle down for him but there’s no rush on my end. Yes, he is on the spectrum, but that doesn’t negate his need to be a three year old.